Cycles of Reflection
Structured feedback loops for your day, week, month, and year
In a previous post I introduced the two core components of an intentional life. Deciding Who You Want to Be, and Actually Being That Person. These two components form the foundation of an intentional life and, in a healthy system, are constantly feeding back and forth into each other.
One way to structure that process1, is to set up feedback loops. Opportunities to review and to reflect on how things have been going, and to use that knowledge of the past to make a plan for the future. Then you go out and do the things you’ve planned, and then reflect on that, and plan for the next chunk of time, and…2
These feedback loops can be any length of time (an hour, a month, a decade) and overlap with each other, and they can be one off3, or regularly recurring.
My Recurring Feedback Loops
As well as irregular feedback loops for milestones or projects I currently have regularly recurring feedback loops across 4 timeframes: Daily, Weekly, Month*ly4, and Yearly. Each of these has its own framing, and there’s a consistent thread throughout of looking at what has happened previously, what do I want to happen in the future, and what am I putting in place to make it more likely to happen.
Daily
Looking back: At the end of every day I5 list out What Went Well for that day. This can include positive moments from the day, things I learnt (including things that went wrong that I learnt from), and choices I made that I was happy with and want to reinforce6.
Looking forward: After my evening review I’ll look briefly at what the next day holds and make sure the daily overview in my journal is up to date.7
Every morning as part of my morning routine8 I look at what I’m going to be doing that day, including moments where I expect to find Joy, and areas where I might be challenged.
Weekly
Looking back: Every week (usually on a Thursday) I will look at my time tracking data for the last week to see how I’ve been spending my time.
Looking forward: Then I’ll set up my journal for the next week9, ruling out the lines10 and populating each day with any events happening at specific times. After I’ve got an overview of the fixed points I’ll add tasks to the days as appropriate.
Month*ly
We’re scaling up on time and intensity now! My daily and weekly reviews take11 less than 30 minutes each. My monthly review usually takes over an hour.
Looking back:
I start my monthly review by reading through my Directions, to remind myself of what’s important, then I ask myself four questions about the month that has been:
What’s happened? - This is the big question. I go through my calendar, my journal, and my time tracking and list out everything that has happened over the last 4 weeks. This includes large events12, small moments or memories13, how I’ve felt, and what I’ve been thinking about or struggling with. I usually start chronologically but group by theme (e.g. all of hockey as one overall thing) and try to take short notes to come back to if something pops up out of order.
What is working well? - Another list! Where have I been thriving? What am I happy with or proud of? When have I felt good?
Where did I feel resistance? - And then the opposite. In what areas have I not been living the life I want to? What has been hard?
Where was I most content? - The idea here is to choose one moment where I felt the most content. Usually I settle for a list of less than 5… This is a really interesting14 question to look back on during my annual review.
Looking forward:
After looking at my past month I then look forward and ask myself “What will I focus on in the next four weeks?” This is usually a combination of major events in my calendar, and thinking about where I felt resistance in the last month. From that I will determine the five specific habits I want to track in my journal for the next month15.
Annual
Looking back / forward: For the last two years I’ve used Year Compass for my annual review. It’s a free (digital or printable) template that walks you through a review of the year ending and a plan for the next. I skip some questions that don’t spark joy, and start by going through my monthly reviews of what happened (rather than my calendar as prompted), and have overall found it to be a good reflection tool.
I also have some less deep, but just as meaningful, reflection time with friends, where we’ve been asking each other the same questions for 5 or 6 years including: “What is your most cherished memory from this year?”, “How many bones did you break?”, and “How much spare change do you have?”.
Conclusion
It’s important to set aside enough time for each review that it doesn’t feel rushed, and to schedule that time in advance. In my case I have a recurring task in my task management system for my monthly and annual reviews, my weekly review is written in to my journal as part of setting up a new week, and my daily review is built in to my morning and evening routine.
I’ve been through various iterations on all my feedback loops. My monthly review in particular looks almost unrecognisable from how it started out. The right questions or structure can make the difference between doing this once, and keeping the habit forever, so it’s also really important to find something that works for you and will keep working for you.
You are, of course, encouraged to pick up my questions and run with them, but I suggest after a cycle or two you make some time to look at your system and see what’s working and what you want to change. Feedback loops need feedback loops too after all.
As always I hope this has been useful for you, feel free to reach out with any questions or comments.
Ngā mihi,
Tom
Rather than just allowing it to occasionally happen
In a couple of youth development contexts I’ve talked about this in terms of the “Plan, Do, Review” model. My google (duckduckgo actually) searches for this turned up a whole range of different variations, none of which simply described what I wanted them to
Usually tied to a specific event or milestone (e.g. starting at a new job, finishing a project) and taking those learnings into future similar situations without a specific next review point
A month* is 4 weeks, 13 months in a year (with one or two rollover days). I started using these so I could make easy comparisons with my financial tracking (my income and major expenses have always been fortnightly or 4 weekly), and continue to use them so I’m always comparing the same number of days, rather than an arbitrary number between 28 and 31… This also means my reviews are always due on the same day of the week.
(Maybe not that spicy take: In an ideal world we’d work on a 13 month calendar with a not-part-of-any-week New Year’s Day (2 in leap years) every year)
In my bullet journal
E.g. I initiated a hard conversation, or I went for a run even though I didn’t want to at first
With events from my calendar and tasks from my task management system
My bullet journal is where things happen in the moment. It combines events from my calendar, and tasks from my task management system, as well as habit tracking, morning gratitudes, and evening reflections (on what went well). I will talk about it in more detail in a future post.
This is a slightly time consuming, but very grounding process.
usually a lot
e.g. a trip away
e.g. person x said thing y
And useful?
As an example my current habits are: Meditate in the morning (before going on my computer/phone). Take my B12 supplement. Do my Te Reo flashcards (in Anki). Stretch / do physio. Read one page (of an actual book).
As usual, excellent content! It's really been informing how I'm starting my year.
I'm currently experimenting on having one set-in-stone-absolutely-cannot-skip reflection cycle of doing a 2 day silent retreat once a month. I've done 2 months of this so far.
It's had the most positively impactful boost of any self improvement attempt for my productivity and happiness so far. I've tried and failed for years to set up diary habits, and accountability buddy check ins, but focusing on this single cycle seems to have the dual function of being a point of deep reflection, and also training qualities I want to improve in! Two birds with one scone.
Most interesting to me is that with having such a deep meditation experience regularly, meditating daily for an hour comes with ease, as I am able to better remember the skill of how to actually meditate well, vs the (still worthwhile) practice of sitting for an hour lost in thought.
For the past 7 years I've done 10 day Vipassana retreats at least once a year with the same great effects, but that annual cycle had many drawbacks, including requiring a job that is chill with lots of unpaid leave, and being pretty expensive to travel to the center, and being too infrequent to get a feedback loop rolling.